Dec
8
Sun
Afflux
Dec 8 all-day

Holyday of the season of The Aftermath. Thank Goddess it’s getting toward the end of the year. Thank Goddess the aftermath of what you did all year isn’t too bad. Well, not as bad as it could have been.

Dec
23
Mon
Circlemas
Dec 23 all-day

Celebrating circles, geometry’s most boring shape. On this day circles are pondered, noticed, and appreciated. Celebrants of Circlemas may decorate themselves, their households, or other things with circles and circular patterns, and partake only of circular foods.

Dec
28
Sat
Card Playing Day
Dec 28 all-day

Grab a deck and play.

Dec
29
Sun
St Racc’s Day
Dec 29 all-day

Inspired by raccoons digging through the trash generated by other holydays, this is a day to shed any earthly ties that are affecting you, honour trash-scavenging animals, and dwell on how you would like to change in the next year.

Dec
30
Mon
Packaging Day
Dec 30 all-day

A day to accumulate more earthly ties and take advantage of post-holyday sales. It doesn’t have to be a shopping holiday however, and is more centered around treating and indulging yourself, especially concerning things that are a change in your lifestyle, outlook, or aesthetic.

Dec
31
Tue
Maleye
Dec 31 all-day

Beware the Dreaded Illuminati on Eye Days. Our ancient foes stole Eye Days from us as a time to commit particularly heinous and bloodthirsty acts upon any Discordian they could capture. Make sure your membership paperwork in the AISB is up-to-date and be ready to produce it on demand. In addition, to ensure the readiness of fellow Discordians, pretend to be an inspection agent with the AISB and make surprise checks on their membership paperwork

Jan
1
Wed
New Year’s Day
Jan 1 all-day

Not really a holyday so much as a calendrical event marked by a hangover

Jan
3
Fri
Festival of Sleep Day
Jan 3 all-day

Sleep is important. Get some.

Jan
5
Sun
Mungday
Jan 5 all-day

Celebration of the Apostle Hung Mung. Appropriate activities include thigh-slapping, laughing, ripping off other people’s ideas, and hunting cabbages.

Jan
8
Wed
Emperor Norton I Day
Jan 8 all-day

Commemorating the Life and Memory of His Imperial Majesty Emperor Norton I, Emperor and Protector of Modieva, who left us on this day in 3046 YOLD (1880 CE).